Beholden (Bayou Bear Chronicles Book 4) by Felix Lila

Author:Felix, Lila [Felix, Lila]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: UNKNOWN
Published: 2016-12-12T08:00:00+00:00

Chapter 14

Acacia

I hate myself for loving him.

“I don’t like this.” I spoke to the night, sitting on the edge of my bed like I had since Aspen left. Ridiculous—this boy always having me on the edge of something.

The edge of my sanity after our initial mating.

The edge of throwing up in the days that passed.

And now on the edge of getting up and running all the way to that stupid, dilapidated, ridiculous cabin just to see him when I just saw him a few hours ago. I checked my watch.

Thirty-seven minutes ago.

Pathetic.

What he didn’t know—or maybe he did—was that since we’d run together, my bear was right under my skin—like I could almost feel her fur if I rubbed on my own skin. She was bright and awake and ready for another round.

It was weird. I usually kept her at bay—hiding deep down inside—caged.

The thing was—I liked her near. She was almost like a constant companion—you know—except when she tried to claw me open to get to my mate every five seconds.

Almost like I was safe with her.

Find him. Want him. Too far away.

So damned demanding.

But I couldn’t do that, could I? Could I just run over there like a lovesick person?

That wasn’t me.

That didn’t used to be me.

It was only me with him.

Tell him. Hear him. Touch him. Trust him.

Oh, shut up.

For another hour, or what seemed like another hour in my head, I debated the issue. When my phone buzzed in my pocket, I almost let my claws out and hung from the ceiling.

“Whoever this is, you scared the life out of me!”

A deep rumble almost reached through the phone and grabbed me causing my stomach to tighten and my insides to melt.

“Aspen?”

“Of course. What other males do you have calling you at eleven at night?”

It’s only eleven?

“Yes, Acacia, it’s only eleven. Feels like hours, right?”

He was so right, I could just spit. He knew it too. It was hard that he was probably feeling what I was about the separation.

Being that weak was hard to admit—especially to him. Then again, there was no use denying it.

“It’s all I can think about. It’s like you ripped off my arm when you left except it’s so much more than my arm.”

He sighed into the speaker. “What can I do? How can I ease you?”

Ease me?

“I have no frickin’ idea but that sounded great.”

He laughed again. My desperation made me funny, apparently. “What sounded great?”

“Easing me. I feel so wound up lately but I’m afraid to let go.”

“I know. But I’d never betray you letting go. You’re free to let go with me.”

I didn’t know if that was true or not but I knew that she absolutely knew it to be true.

I smiled as though he were in front of me. “Why are you so good to me?”

He paused and the only thing I heard were perfectly timed breaths over the line. Even that was a comfort, just hearing him breathe.

“You know what I’m thinking right now?”

“What?” My answer came out breathy and mild.

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